When I Grow Up...I Wanna Be Like My Dad

Well, today I have the challenge of attempting to condense this past weekend into a short summary. I feel like I could write a book. I will hit the highlights.

My dad came to Kansas City for the first time since we visited together during my senior year of high school four years ago. It was just me and my dad. A walk around campus and a walk to Loose Park had us both ready for dinner. Salmon, potatoes, vegetables and garlic bread. Then we spent the rest of the evening watching March Madness.

Saturday we went down to the plaza for a cup of coffee and a stroll around. He told me in the fullest detail about how he and my mom had met. I had heard bits and pieces over the years, but I got the full story. Later, we went to the Rockhurst baseball game. Dad and son at a ball game on a Saturday afternoon. Doesn't get much better than that. Plus, Rockhurst pulled out a come-from-behind victory. Afterwards, Colleen met us for Mass and then we all went out to dinner together. I was really excited to have them meet and they got to know each other really well over dinner. I could tell who was doing most of the talking because both my dad and Colleen had tons of food leftover; I just got to sit back and watch. My dad shared stories about growing up, pulling pranks on his sister and he also shared with Colleen the story he had shared with me that morning about how he and my mom had met. Colleen talked about all of the things she is involved in and some about her parents and family - we didn't quite get around to the "Application to Date My Son."

The Red Letter event of the weekend took place at dinner on Sunday right before I took my dad to the airport. The wisdom-provoking question: "Was there ever a time that you and mom thought that it was going to be over?" After a couple of anecdotes of fights, both big and long-lasting, my dad said something that I will never forget. He said, "I will never leave your mom." Simple words, right. I couldn't hold back. I started crying. Afraid that he had shared too much, he began to apologize. I told him not to. I said that it was exactly what I needed to hear. The last time that he said that it had even crossed his mind was long before I even ever noticed that they fought. I simply responded letting him know that I couldn't be more proud to have him as my dad.

One of the plagues of our generation is fatherless homes. The absence of real men in our society is, in my opinion, the root of many of the injustices in our country and our world. God has blessed me with a father who, more through his actions than his words necessarily, has taught me more than he may even know about what it means to be a real man. Dad, what can I say? Thank you.

Childhood, Revisited

This weekend, I volunteered with the Girl Scouts. I would like to say that I have a lot of flat out, pure fun but Saturday I got to be a kid at heart. To start, crafts. When was the last time I did crafts? Well, outside of being a resident assistant, I honestly can't remember. A birthday party when I was 10, maybe. Either way, came home with my own personalized picture frame - made out of tongue depressors, or as I like to call them, "Aaah sticks" from the doctor's office.

While the crafts were all fun and good, I like just going a little nuts with some physical activity too. It sort of happened as an accident. I was helping one of the girls bring her picture frame to the drying table and when I turned around, she jumped on my back for a piggyback ride. I started walking around the gym. Then she wanted me to go faster. There was an empty stretch on the sidelines so I started running. I might have bit off more than I could chew. That decision initiated a line of 8-year-old girls waiting for their turn. One girl at a time got up for a piggyback ride while the rest of the group raced me down the sideline and back. Eight-year-old kids are heavier than I thought. I got tired quick! Well, I took it up a notch...one girl on my back one on the front. I was alright for the run down, but when I turned around, I lost my balance and all three of us collapsed on the floor. No injuries. Laughter from all except for the supervisor. Whoops! Game over. It was fun while it lasted.

I wish that we could all have fun like that all of the time. Reckless abandon. I just want to live life to the fullest. Having fun just seems to become more and more complicated as we get older. When did that happen? I think back to a day when I watched my three younger cousins, entertained by a single balloon for literally two and a half hours. Something so simple. Such pure joy. Now, I think about how easily I get bored. I love the occasions when I get to return to that state of mind, simplifying life back into what it is meant to be, joyous and fun. Oh to be a kid again!

Listening: A Great Gift of Being Present

I realized when I had finished writing this blog that I had somewhat jumped all over the place...hope it comes together well and makes sense for the reader!

My neighbor has had a rough go over the last week. I had not met him until yesterday when I decided that I would provide some comfort in the form of my mom’s banana bread. It turned out to be a great time because Colleen came over for a few hours and helped me bake it and then we delivered it to, as we found out yesterday, Jared.

Our society is go, go, go all of the time. I know that personally, I get so busy that too often I only think about myself and my own struggles and I forget that other people are hurting too. Everyone is carrying their own cross. A challenge for myself: I would like to stop myself from complaining about all of my “first-world problems” and be more in tune with others. When I am with other people, I want them to feel like I am REALLY there – listening. I have found myself lately falling into making people think that I’m really paying attention by responding with cues like, “Yes, that makes sense” or “I understand” when I had actually just been making really good eye contact and my mind was in a completely different place. I do hate it when that happens. Because I truly do care about other people and what they’re going through – or what joys that have to share with me. And I want to share in both because I know that when people console me in difficult times, it brings me comfort knowing that I am not in it alone; or when they smile and get excited when I tell them great news, it enhances my joy knowing that I can share that with someone else.

Call me an idealist, I do believe that it's possible for people to be reasonable with one another. It's a matter of making decisions based on commitments rather than on feelings and emotions. I paraphrase: "Be diligent in the small things, and you will become faithful in serious matters." For the past few weeks, I have made it a goal of mine not to eat or drink anything after midnight except for water. The aforementioned quote has come to mind multiple times during that time when I have thought to myself in the midst of a late-night craving, "What does it matter if I have a small snack, it's really not that big of a deal." In truth, does it really matter if I have a handful of chips at 12:05am? No, not actually. But the principle of the situation is this: I have made a commitment and I want to train myself to be a man of my word for more important issues.

Now, to tie these two themes together. I know there have been times in my life when I have been upset with people, even and especially with those whom I love the most. If I treated them poorly and deserted them because of one instance of being upset with them then I wouldn't have any friends or family left. Being more present and aware of what others might be going through and simply listening to people is, in my opinion, a pivotal aspect in turning this world around and bringing people together rather than ignoring and separating everyone which leads to misunderstandings and chaos.

Be aware of feelings; do not ignore them because they are there for a reason. But do not allow them to control you, or make decisions for you.

Bitter Cold Build

Some guys from my fraternity volunteered at a Habitat build on Saturday. The past month, every weekend has been beautiful weather. Not this weekend. When we arrived at 8am it was below 20 degrees. Good thing they had already installed the heating in one of the houses!

They did need to recruit a group of people to do some work on a house outside, putting up plywood siding on the framework of the house. We took turns hammering, holding the ladder, and shifting into the other house when we couldn't feel our fingers and toes anymore. After a couple of hours doing the outdoor work, we had finished the task and there was only indoor work for us in the heated house. Perfect timing! It was just starting to get warm outside!

Sharon was the woman for whom one of the homes was being built. Habitat requires people who are accepted to work 350 "equity hours" in order to earn their new home. Sharon was at 500 and still going. She said she was even going to donate all of her extra hours to others who are working on their homes. What a lady!

Great day overall. I came home and zonked out in my bed in the middle of the afternoon. May or may not have missed an obligation because I slept through my alarm...whoops! I definitely needed it though. An awesome day of bonding with my brothers and other people from our community.

A Whole New World!

Childhood, please make your way into my twenties as the classic Disney film comes to the stage at the Kaufmann Theater. OK!

At the beginning of the semester, I talked with my roommate about going to see Aladdin on stage at the new Kaufmann Theater just on the south side of downtown KC. When I finally got a chance to look into it about a week and a half ago, I realized, oh! it's next weekend. Well, acting quickly, I thought it would be a perfect date night for Colleen and I. I was able to get in touch with some other friends who also thought it was a great opportunity for us all to go out and enjoy each other. Quadruple date +1 = a fantastic night, reliving childhood memories.

I got to meet a new friend who I will be going to Nicaragua with in under a month. Alex Boesch. Holy smokes. What a man! Can't wait to spend an entire week with this guy. We hit it right off, going shopping for groceries for the potluck dinner that we had before the show. That awkward, "I don't know what we're supposed to talk about because we just met and this is really weird" was not there. It was so cool! As we shopped, we also took the night up a notch, grabbing a bouquet of flowers for our beautiful dates.

After a post-show ice cream at Winstead's, we went back to one of the girl's house, Anna, and four of us had some great conversation. And then...Just Dance 3 on the Wii. Abandon any pride you might be carrying before you play this game. It was so great! We capped the evening off in the best way possible. The four of us prayed together, praising God for the incredible blessings of the night and lifted up personal intentions. God is GREAT!

Expect the Extraordinary

Can an idea change the way you live your life? I didn't use to think it could - so dramatically anyway. I've always thought of myself to be a relatively positive person, but when I heard this wisdom from a priest in his homily over the Christmas break, I really let it sink in. Now, this view on life is a motto that I live by daily. Not on my own, of course. I don't simply expect extraordinary things to happen for no reason. I expect them to happen because of Jesus Christ.

I truly do see a lot of things in a different light than I would say most people that I come across. I am honestly in wonder at the very basic functions of the human body - all of the chemical reactions and messages that have to go just right for me to bend my arm, all happening at an unbelievable speed. Anyway this new faith-based motto has really changed the way that I approach life. Do I fall into despair sometimes, of course, I'm human after all; but striving for true hope and faith that God is in complete control gives me such freedom to enjoy the pleasures that life has to offer. Are there issues in our world that seem hopeless and lost? YES. But that is only because we focus on things have been in the past and we become content with the status quo and for whatever reason decide that it's not worth fighting for because it's hopeless. Challenge: try. If there is something that you would like to see changed in your life, try. This is going to be a little preachy, but be the change you want to see in the world. Every day, we are presented with opportunities to make a difference in our lives and in the lives of others - even if its something small. And actually, I believe those small, everyday things to be so much more important because they add up...QUICK!

Well, I hope that others can find a motto that can do for them what "Expect the Extraordinary" has done for me. God bless.

Leadership Escalator

This weekend I went to Washington, D.C. for the March for Life. First of all...WOW!!! Half of a million people gathered together to march onto Capitol Hill and in front of the Supreme Court to protest the injustice of abortion - towards babies and women. I'm going to go into an experience from the weekend, but first I just quickly want to encourage anyone who desires a culture of life for our country...there is hope and we are going to win with perseverance, dedication, and prayer. The tides are turning!

During our time in D.C. we had to ride the Metro in order to get around. We were exiting with a large crowd of people and I fell behind my group and so I was weaving between people trying to catch up. I got to the escalator and realized that the people I knew were at the front of the line about halfway up already. There was another escalator void of anyone that wasn't moving. I decided that I could catch up to them if I went up the one that nobody was on. When I got even with my group, our eyes met and apparently that signaled the competitive green light in my head and I started running up the escalator. The race was on and the people from my group also started sprinting. Well I got second place...I'm not disappointed...theirs was moving. Anyway, a little later on while we were on another bus someone was talking about it and mentioned the crowd of people that were running behind me - people who were not with our group. I didn't realize it while it was happening but apparently, I had provoked a whole crowd to run with reckless abandon up the escalator.
Now, here's the lesson that I'm taking out of this: our actions affect others. Brand new revelation, right?! Well, I just got to thinking how we can all find opportunities to lead others in our lives. Live out what you believe in your heart to be true and be in tune to how others respond. I've got room for improvement in both aspects. You never know how people are going to react. I was not trying to inspire people to sprint up the escalator, but they followed. Be aware of your actions and strive to make them worth following.